10 Rules For Effective Communication

Effective communication skills come fromto write them down and read them back to you.
following the rules and the rules start with you3. Be as specific in your speech as possible.
being 100% Responsible for the success of all ofEliminate pronouns, name things specifically, use
your communications!dates and deadlines as in 'how many by when'. "I
WARNING - this topic, Effective Communicationwant Tom to make 30 outbound sales calls to
Skills Through 100% Responsibility, calls for aactive clients by 5 PM today. By 'active' I mean
temporary 'suspension of disbelief'. What is aclients that we are currently invoicing. This is
'suspension of disbelief'? In theatre it is the abilitynon-negotiable and I want Tom in my office
to sit in a dark box, in uncomfortable seats andbefore he leaves today to let me know this is
become so involved in a scene that you arecomplete. If I'm not in my office he can't leave
temporarily transported to the balcony outside ofuntil he finds me and we speak of this face to
Juliet's house or on the battlefield at Agincourt.face." As opposed to 'tell him I want 30 calls
Similarly, taking 100% responsibility intoday and I want to be updated'.
communication is 'make believe' and is a tool to4. Before you begin speaking to a team or a
help you create more effective communications.group ask them if they are fully 'present'. "Does
It is not real and you won't be able to makeanyone have anything on their mind that will keep
everyone bend to your will, see it 'your way' orthem from focusing on our meeting and our
say 'yes' to everything you want. It will, however,discussion?"
make you way more powerful in all of these: use5. Do periodic check-ins, "Are you with me? Any
with caution!questions on what I just said?"
What are the common communication barriers6. Send after meeting notes with a request for a
and the communication breakdowns we most'read and understood' reply (by when?)
often face? The often sound like the following7. Eliminate 2nd or 3rd party communications.
statements.Don't ask someone to deliver a message if it's
- I thought you said...urgent. If you're empowering a subordinate ask
- What I heard was...them for a bullet point of their presentation
- I wasn't sure what you meant but I didn't wantbefore they deliver it.
to interrupt8. Label your communications before you start.
- Oh, I wasn't paying attention at that point IThis way you won't catch anyone off guard and
guess...have them split their focus while you're talking
- She said that you said...between what you're saying and mentally
- Oh, I assumed that you meant...'regrouping'. "Before we start I want you to know
So how, in the face of those breakdowns do youthat this is a conversation about you not
communicate at 100%?delivering according to our expectations..."
Try these 10 simple steps and you'll see how9. Make pre-meeting or pre-conversations notes
your communication skills will improve. You'll alsoto help you organize your thoughts and share
save a lot of time by getting yourself 'heard' thethem more clearly.
first time!10. Get in the habit of asking, at the conclusion of
every communication or meeting, 'Was this
1. When giving someone instructions stop and askeffective for you?', 'Did you feel that I
them what they just heard.communicated clearly with you', 'Was my
2. When giving someone expectations ask themcommunication done with care and respect?